Mallory McPherson is a TCON volunteer on the 2011 team of supporters. Her first visit was back in 2006 when TCON was still young and developing. This time around, Mallory volunteered to contribute journalistic pieces for TCON’s blog. She currently lives in Colorado and is a student at Denver University.
It is easy to come to Uganda and be unsure of how to feel. I first came to visit my uncle, Dave McPherson (TCON’s Founding Director) and see what he was doing out here five years ago in 2006. A total of 24 hours of flying and 8 hours of driving (involving five foot potholes and an overturned double-decker) led us to a conference center with shrieking women packed like sardines in a can. As we entered the room, they immediately began praising my uncle, and in turn my whole family. I was aware that Dave moved here to “help” the widows, but I was unaware of how many were a part of the organization, how exactly he was helping, and why I was receiving this praise.
I did not understand at the age of 12, who these women were. I knew they had been discarded by society, but to me, they were receivers of my dad’s money and my uncle’s hard work. This mindset made me feel guilt for the life I had, the problems I didn’t have.
As we traveled through Soroti’s town center, we came across a white preacher promising hundreds a cure from HIV/AIDS if they gave their souls to Jesus. This made my soul cry. It is not hard to see the corruption in Uganda. This is something I still notice here, but now I am more aware to the cultural sexism which many of the widows’ problems stem from.
These women are raised being told that their job is to fulfill a man and once their husband dies, they become a mother of all problems. In many situations, a husband will contract HIV and not tell his wife. So once the woman shows signs of illness, the husband can blame it on her and not have to deal with the repercussions of his actions.
Today I noticed this attitude illustrated in their daily work. We arrived at a mountain of rock with maybe 100 women scattered at its base. Every woman had a mallet in her hand that she was using to crush rocks. These women turn the rocks into concrete to be sold. There were men there too, but none were working. All around Soroti, I have noticed the women busy at work while the men are often found sitting around. Dave has said that sometimes when Mzungus (white people) come around, they pretend to work in hope of collecting pity money.
This is evidence of sexism, what I believe to be the deepest problem for these women. They are brainwashed to think they have no worth, no power. Their existences are defined only through subservience. You cannot combat this issue with $30 a month, or a pair of clothes that will be rags within months. You can only do this through enabling these women to define themselves as powerful.
This year, upon entering the conference, I saw empowered women. Women who have created their own identities. I heard them speak through their smiles about how they are the most prosperous people in their village. That they went from a mother of all problems to a woman with a farm, educated children, and full bellies. Yes, TCON gave them seed and education, but the widows learned how to farm, planted, tended, and then sold their fruits. They are shattering Uganda’s social system. They are happy to not have a man taking things from them. I felt an overwhelming joy exude from these women, not for my uncle, not for my father, but for God and for their own accomplishments and progress. Progress made possible through TCON.